The International Tennis Hall of Fame vigilantly protects the heritage of the game, and its Newport museum is filled with glorious artifacts. But here’s a zany, late-summer collection of alternative items we could imagine might pop up in the Tennis Hall of Quirky.
- The apron worn by pizza waitress Melissa Johnson, who joyfully streaked across Wimbledon’s Center Court just before the 1996 final.
- The crazy, whiplash spaghetti racket that was banned in 1978.
- The litter Billie Jean King was carried in on as she came into the Astrodome to play the Battle of the Sexes.
- The yellow and red Sugar Daddy coat Bobby Riggs wore during much of the match.
- The lace panties Gussy Moran wore at Wimbledon.
- Any of Bethanie Mattek-Sands’ truly wacky outfits before she went mainstream.
- A pair of Bud Collins pants.
- A pair of Nadal’s Capri pirate pants.
- Andre Agassi’s toupee.
- Dennis Van der Meer’s pet cheetah.
- Ted Tinling’s earring.
- The made-by-her-mom pinafore dress worn by teen Tracy Austin.
- The flask the mother of all tennis divas, Suzanne Lenglen, drank cognac from during changeovers, way back when.
- Some of the beads that young Serena and Venus wore in their hair.
- The black biker suit Serena wore at the US Open.
- The emblazoned cream blazer Federer sported at Wimbledon.
- Ivan Lendl’s sensible French legionnaire hat, which was perhaps the dorkiest tennis headgear that has ever been worn.
- The golf balls Richard Nixon gave to Arthur Ashe.
- Some of the ticker tape in Althea Gibson’s parade after she won at Forest Hills.
- The station wagon Jack Kramer’s barnstorming troupe of pros drove in to take tennis to Topeka and Tulsa in the 50s.
- Pat Cash’s checkerboard headband.
- The spiked shoes Rod Laver changed into to win the Grand Slam in 1969.
- The green couch featured courtside for years at the Family Circle tourney.
- Agassi’s denim tennis shorts.
- The rackets Bob Dylan and George Harrison played with when they hit on the Isle of Wight in 1969.
- The aluminum pole young Martina Navratilova hugged in 1974, when she won the first tourney of her career and didn’t have anyone else to embrace.
- One of the red flags that were originally used to signal a tiebreak.
- The towel Fernando Verdasco imperiously demanded from a ball boy.
- Rafa’s kabillion-dollar watch he wears during every match.
- Dominik Hrabaty’s pink shirt with all its holes.
By the way, after losing to his fellow Zambian Musumba Bwayla, Lighton Mdewayl contended, “Bwayla is a stupid man and a hopeless player. He has a huge nose and is cross-eyed. Girls hate him. He beat me because my jockstrap was too tight and because when he serves he farts, and that made me lose my concentration, for which I am famous throughout Zambia.” Mdewayl’s jockstrap has got to go in the Quirky Hall of Fame.
