By Bill Simons
Sometimes there is no rhyme, no reason.
Sometimes you just can’t read the tea leaves. The middle doesn’t hold.
Or, as Jim Courier said, “You just can’t put the words rational and tennis player in the same sentence.”
* Serena Williams, said by some to be the best player in woman’s history, and the tournament’s prohibitive favorite, is dumped out in the 4th round by Ana Ivanovic.
* Everyone knows that women’s tennis these days is all about the big three—Serena, Maria, and Victoria Azarenka. Yet none of them made it to the semis. Go figure!
* People properly rail against racism and sexism. And don’t you dare call disabled folks crippled or handicapped. And while you’re at it, watch your ageism. Do honor your local old fogey. Then again, may we note, size-ism is a rather rampant, often ignored, mindset in our culture. “Stand tall,” goes the cliche, and those cute, but incessant—and completely ill-conceived—AT&T ads pound home the message that bigger is better.
* In tennis, Venus and Serena Williams (the latter of whom was recently described as “built like one of those monster trucks that crushes Volkswagens at sports arenas”), together with Lindsay Davenport, Mary Pierce, and Amelie Mauresmo, ushered in “Big Babe” tennis, which has defined the women’s game for a decade and a half. Yes, there were some pint-sized or more average exceptions: South Afican Amanda Coetzer, 5’5″ Justine Henin, and even 5’7″ 2013 Wimbledon champ Marion Bartoli come to mind. In the old days, Maureen Connolly was just 5’4″when she won the Grand Slam.
Now, Dominika Cibulkova—so tiny, so compact, and the third shortest player on tour—has brought down many a bigger player Down Under, including Maria Sharapova, who is eleven inches taller.
Simply put, Cibulkova has been on fire.
Playing brilliantly in brilliant sunshine, relishing the moment, leaping into forehands, blasting backhands to the corners, she dropped just one set en route to the final, where she will be the first woman from Slovokia (population 5 million) to compete. “The Pocket Rocket” will walk out on Rod “The Rocket” Laver’s Arena to face veteran Li Na, who—if you’ve been living under a rock—is from China, which is just 280 times bigger than Slovokia.
So surely it makes sense that Li Na will prevail on Saturday evening.
She’s going into her third Aussie Open final. Choke alert: this will be Cibulkova’s first. Li Na already has won a Slam, the 2011 French Open and is seeded No. 4, while the Slovakian is a lowly No. 20.
Then again, nobody thought Cibulkova’s good buddy Marion Bartoli, seeded 15, would win Wimbledon. But she did. And Cibulkova delights in defying convention. Her eyes sparkle—are they telling us something we don’t yet know? A little woman from a little country, she scored big wins over the No. 3, 11, and 16 seeds, before taking down yesterday’s genius, No. 5 Agnieszka Radwanska, who was limp and lackluster. “She looks pained, she looks confused, she looks rattled,” said AO radio. Truth be told, it was a hellish performance.
All the while, Cibulkova emanated a certain “stairway to heaven” defiance, telling Inside Tennis later, “It’s not about how tall are you. Even if you are tall, it doesn’t mean that you are 100% going to make it. It’s just that you have to really want something and believe. There is nothing more important than this.”
A dynamo, she was born with a certain “make-it-happen’ spark. ”I have it since I was little kid,” she told IT. “When I play my best, that’s where you can see the power and the fight. You have to have something extra if you want to be one of the best players and you are not the tallest. This is what is my extra.”
But will it be enough to beat the savvy, powerful, and experienced Li Na, who can overpower many with ease?
Who knows?
But just remember: This is the upside-down Open Down Under.
A year ago in Australia, Cibulkova lost to Radwanska 6-0, 6-0. Today, she beat the Pole 6-1, 6-2.
Our advice: Don’t put the word rational and tennis player in the same sentence.
HEADLINE OF THE DAY: RAFA’S STILL GOT SKIN IN THE GAME
WHEN IN DOUBT, CHOOSE YOUR TENNIS PARTNER, NOT THE HEIRESS: Stan Wawrinka is a warrior who has come back from all sorts of setbacks. He has the words of the Irish poet Samuel Beckett tattooed on his left forearm: “Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.”
It turns out that Beckett, who died in 1989, adored sports, especially tennis. In a 2008 profile of the iconic writer, New Yorker writer Benjamin Kunkel observed, “Not long after moving permanently to Paris, Beckett had an altercation on the street with a pimp, who stabbed him in the chest. It points to the complexity of Beckett’s erotic life at the time that this was not his first encounter with the pimp, and that much of his convalescence was spent trying to decide whether to favor as his regular girlfriend Peggy Guggenheim, the American heiress, or Suzanne Deschevaux-Dumesnil, his tennis partner. Ultimately, he chose Suzanne, a Frenchwoman six years his senior, whose influence seems to have promoted more work and less carousing.”
T-SHIRT OF THE DAY: EAT SLEEP GENIE REPEAT
SWISS ‘N SWEDES: Both of Switzerland’s stars are coached by Swedes. Federer has Stefan Edberg, while Stan Wawrinka is with Magnus Norman.
THE STEFAN FACTOR: Speaking of Stefan Edberg, Stefan Kozlov, 15, the last American standing in the boys’ semifinals, was named after him..
NORTH AMERICAN BORDER WARS: Before the semifinal between Li Na and Canadian Eugenie Brouchard, there was talk of the surprisingly modest connections between American and Canadian tennis. American-based tennis entrepreneur Peter Burwash played on the Canadian Davis Cup team. Chris Evert met Carling Basset in the 1984 US Open semis and dominated her, winning all eight of their meetings. Vasek Pospisil has a winning record over John Isner. Milos Raonic won three straight SAP championships in San Jose. So why is Canadian tennis finally rocking, when of late, American tennis, particularly on the men’s side, has faced its share of speed bumps? Look for a great rivalry to unfold between Sloane Stephens and Bouchard. Stephens now leads 2-1.
