By Bill Simons
In the imperfect but nonetheless must-see documentary Venus and Serena, Serena Williams talks of several imaginary “inner Serenas” or personality types. There is “Summer,” a kind of benign personal assistant, “Megan,” “Psycho Serena,” and the dreaded, much-feared “Laquanda.” To learn more about these different sides of Ms. Williams, Inside Tennis had the following dialogue with the real Serena:
Inside Tennis: So I really want to talk with you about your personality types. What’s the difference between Serena as Megan and Serena as Summer?
Serena Williams: Summer is my assistant who lives inside my body. It’s weird. She’s very effective. She’s unbelievable. She’s really like organized and she’s amazing. I love her.
I remember Megan. I forgot about her. I think she was a bad girl. Like [she] kind of like just liked to have a lot of fun. [I] haven’t seen her in a long time.
IT: What’s the difference between Megan and Psycho Serena? And who is Psycho Serena?
SW: I haven’t seen her either in a while. I have been trying to keep that one under wraps. I think that’s just a girl that gets really crazy on the tennis court and just really fights really hard. Just, you know, takes it a little too far sometimes.
IT: Just give us a hint, a small hint, of who Laquanda is. Tell us a little bit about her.
SW: Oh, she’s not allowed to come out. She’s on probation. (Smiling.)
IT: Is there a little bit about Laquanda’s spicy side that you kind of like now and then, just a little bit?
SW: About what?
IT: About her spice, about her nastiness.
SW: She’s not nasty. She’s just real. Keeps it real, keeps it honest. And you just definitely don’t want to cross her. Because you cross her, then she snaps. She’s just a real person.
IT: But you say hi to her now and then?
SW: No, I don’t see her. I don’t speak to her very often. I try never to see her. She’s nuts.
Some just chuckled at the playful exchange, or saw it as a 21st-century reprise of Goran Ivanisevic talking about the “three Gorans”—including the “emergency, 911 Goran”—the Croatt would call during his frequent moments of panic on court. Others read more into Serena’s inventive descriptions. One veteran writer and pop culture observer noted, “I think it’s a bit radical on her part, publicly embracing her crazy aspects in a culture that stigmatizes craziness. It’s a refreshing and creative way of tapping into female (and black) power. Serena really is something else. Her whole persona or personalities are so much richer and more unpredictable than many pop icons, especially tennis ones.”
With this comment in mind, we asked Serena if, she ever took a step back and said, ‘Hey,being Serena Williams ain’t too shabby. I’ve got a great family thing going and I’m traveling the world, enjoying my sport, the celebrity, the fun times.’ In other words, does she ever say, ‘Hey, this is pretty decent?’
“Not once,” Serena replied. “I don’t think so. I think it’s important to kind of reflect on those moments, but I don’t know. I’m always just so intense and so focused and so like busy I don’t think about anything else.”
“For me it’s not about the celebrity,” she added. “It’s just about doing what I can do, and anything else that comes with it is a bonus. I’m just a regular old person that just lives with my sister.”
We followed up by asking, “But do you like it that you’re an athlete who is in a position to express so many parts of yourself and to grow in so many ways?”
“I do,” she said. “I love that, and like I always said, I love how I have been blessed to have an opportunity not only to do that, but I’m in a space where I can help others, as well, and do different charity work too and different things that I believe in. For me, I really feel like it’s a good space to be in.”
Our most artistic dialogue with Serena went like this:
IT: Serena, since you recently posted one of your paintings online the other day, if there is there any artist that you particularly would liked to have met or received instruction from if you could?
SW: No … [well] there is a guy actually on PBS [Bob Ross], and I think he draws. You know that guy? I would love to take lessons from that guy.
IT: I think he’s dead.
SW: Oh. Oh.
IT: He’s great, though, but he’s dead.
SW: Well, oops.
IT: It was an open-ended question. Anyone dead or alive.
SW: Yeah, okay. I love his personality. I love how he makes shading and he does a lot of [types of] artwork. It seemed like he could work with real beginners like me [so that I’d feel] ‘Wow, I can do this too kind of thing.’ That would have been nice.
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FRENCH OPEN BUZZ: YOUTH STRUGGLES, EXPERIENCE PREVAILS
AN ELITE BREED: After IT pointed out that our former Managing Editor once interviewed Martina Navratilova’s dog, Yonex, we asked Serena if her one-year-old dog, Chip, would grant us one. She said the dog doesn’t do interviews.
THE TENNIS CHANNEL FALTERS IN KEY MATCH: The nation’s biggest cable operator, Comcast, won a unanimous court decision in its longstanding legal battle with the independently-owned Tennis Channel. The US Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia ruled earlier this week that Tennis Channel had failed to prove that Comcast discriminated against it by placing the channel in a sports tier that is higher-priced but has fewer subscribers.
A RAFA RECORD THAT NADAL AIN’T GONNA BRAG ABOUT: When Rafael Nadal dropped the first set of his second-round match to Slovokian Martin Kuzan, it was only the third time in his career that he had lost back-to-back first sets in a tournament.
GO FIGURE: Some say Hawkeye’s computer-generated images of where balls land are more accurate on clay courts than the actual marks. Of course, on occasion umpires look at the wrong mark.
SWEET REDEMPTION: John Isner lost five-set matches at all four of last year’s majors. But after dropping the two first sets of his second-round match against Ryan Harrison, he powered his way back to win 5-7, 6-7 (3), 6-3, 6-1, 8-6. It was the first time in his career he came back from two sets down to win.
SAY IT ISN’T SO: Young American Ryan Harrison, who’s had many a tough draw in majors, has now played 12 Slams without getting beyond the second round.
FOXHOLE FAVES: IT asked Ryan Harrison what athlete outside of tennis he would call on to have his back were he in a foxhole. The New Orleans Saint fan said Drew Brees and LeBron James. John Isner, a Carolina Panther fan, said Cam Newton.
A CRY OF DESPERATION: One broadcaster doing Rafael Nadal’s second-round match cried out, “Stop bouncing the ball and serve it!”
FROM ONE COURT TO ANOTHER: The former Croatian player Mario Ancic, who studied law at Columbia, is now working for the legal department of the NBA.
YOUTH WILL NOT BE SERVED: There are no more male teens left in the Roland Garros draw. Past teen winners at the French Open include Michael Chang and Mats Wilander. According to the ATP, the average age of players in the top 100 has risen from 24.92 in ’03 to 27.13 in ’12.
DIFFERENT TIMES, DIFFERENT WINS, DIFFERENT REASONS: Bethanie Mattek-Sands has had two major marquee wins in her career. Yesterday, she said she beat former French Open champ Li Na because she had a focused game plan. In 2008 at Wimbledon, when she was quite unheralded, she beat the previous year’s finalist Marion Bartoli because she was in love and her soon-to-be husbandJustin had given her a diamond ring between the first and second rounds.
MARINER MEMORIES: Recently Bethanie Mattek-Sands has been walking out on court listening to the song “My Oh My” by rapper Macklemore, an homage to the late Seattle Mariners broadcaster Dave Niehaus.
NADAL ON SCHEDULING: Now that there is a move to have an Asian tennis league during the off-season, IT pointed out to Rafael Nadal that a while ago players felt the tennis season was too long—that there were too many matches and too much travel. The Spaniard responded by saying that he “never was against the longer schedule … If you have tournaments during every week during the whole year … [that] is not the problem.”
“When that happens, you create jobs,” he continued. “More people have the chance to live from tennis. More players have the chance to win money to pay a coach and to travel with better conditions.”
“The problem is not the calendar, how long it is. The problem is the mandatory tournaments … [and] the way the rankings are made; that you cannot miss important tournaments if you want to have chances to be in the top. So at the end, you have to put everything on a balance and try to make the right decisions.
But it is always the same. It is something similar to the schedule of yesterday. It is the same people here for long time. They are happy like this. They don’t make big decisions. Probably most of the people who take positions are in a comfortable position in this moment, so they don’t want to take a risk and chances to change things that are more positive for the players, the tournaments, the show.”
35 IS THE NEW 21: The relaxed and calm No. 12, Tommy Haas, 35, beat Jack Sock 7-6 (3), 6-2, 7-5 to reach the third round, where he will play John Isner. Since Haas is an American citizen, it means the US will definitely have a man in the fourth round.
